July, 2012

Dear Bachelor Diary,

I had this really crazy erotic dream about my fiancée last night and I simply MUST tell you about the amusing aftermath of it, in-relation to the “Golden Cheetah” she gave me two years ago, this month. It is my most treasured gift from her (outside of herself, that is).

I went to sleep early at midnight that night – you know it is early for me.
My dream awakened me because I was so “turned-on”, Oh My God! I would have cried-out had I not been temporarily visiting back here at my Mum’s house in my old boyhood room, lol!

Okay, so I wake up on Friday to go to work on the computer for my two new Social Media Marketing clients.
I had taken gold cheetah off the night before, and draped the chain across the picture of her in the yellow flowers field that I keep on the bedside night table.

In the moments right after I got out of bed, I thought that I picked it up to put back around my neck before I went downstairs to make my coffee and did not think about it again.
Around 2pm I went for a lunch break; accomplished some errands and shopping.
Later in the day, I was talking to Mum in the kitchen and complimented her on a nice diamonds and gold bracelet that she was wearing on her right wrist! As she described when she got it and who gave it to her, the telephone rang about the same time that I felt for gold cheetah and noticed that it was not around my neck! I took the opportunity to go upstairs to the room and look for it while Mum was on the phone, but only found my gold chain on the wood floor under the foot of the bed I’m sleeping in these nights, but no gold cheetah! It was nowhere to be found!

Soon, Mum came upstairs and joined me in the search for Golden Cheetah. At one point she asked me, amusingly, “Is it in your bath cloth??” (That is how Mum’s eighty-seven year-old memory brain is these days, bless her heart)
“No, Mum, I took it off before I turned the light off last night” I said.
“Why did you take it off?” she replied.

My Mum reminds me of my InnaNina in Ukraine (where I am soon to visit). She has a lot of gold necklace around her neck; I think those guys will get along fine when they finally meet!
“I never take these off…” she said, pointing to her many gold chains and medallions pendants.
So, we kept searching; me trying not to “bug-out” while remembering that I’d been through a similar experience (which I blogged about) back in Nashville in June!
Mum kept suggesting ridiculous possible locations for Gold Cheetah all the while. “Move the dresser; move the night table, open the drawers!” she went. lol

In situations like these, I have learned to step-back, retrace my steps and try not to think of the situation in a panic-like state. I did this on the side of the bed that I remembered getting out of it on, while Mum continued randomly to search the walk-in closet on the other side when I thought to myself, ”if my chain came-off and fell to-the-floor where it did, then WHY was gold cheetah not close-by??

THEN…it came to me: It might be still on my person (body)! So, with my left hand, I felt my neck and then down the center of my chest as I stood there. Past my solar plexus, my navel and (dare I say) into my new turquoise bikini briefs which I just bought for my trip to Ukraine. I got Mum’s attention, “Mum! What if…” As I felt down into my “family jewels”, running my fingers cautiously down into the bottom of my blinkers until they touched that familiar metal and shape; “Uh-oh…I think I found it…”

There, under the bottom tip of my member, was Golden Cheetah, resting quietly in my blinkers. I had not even felt anything “extra” down there! LMAO!!
“Mum, you will never guess where it IS!” As she looked over at me pulling it out of my pants (the cheetah not my member), a smirk came over her, “Down there ??” she asked.
“Yep”, I said, right under the tip of my ‘manhood’!” That is when I confessed to her, “Ya know Ma, I’ve got to tell you, I had this really erotic dream about Inna last night; Oh wow, and now this happens??”

We had a good laugh and I had to hug Mum tight for trying to help be find it and now being part of a story that will last forever. “Well, you can’t make this stuff up!” she commented. “I guess she really laid it on you from afar through that cheetah! If I hadn’t seen it, you would not believe it.” Mum said. Inna means more to me than ANY gold trinket or money.

Maybe, Inna “controls” the Golden Cheetah with her special Slavic magic!
I guess we soon shall “see” now that I have my “ticket to ride” ( :

Comments welcome as usual!